Man's Applaud

Okay, let me just say that I love Elizabeth Prentiss!

This past year I read her biography, by Sharon James (which I highly recommend), and now I am enjoying her book, Stepping Heavenward! Elizabeth is an incrediably gifted and honest writer. I just recently read and marveled at the following journal entry from her book:
It is high time to stop and think. I have been like one running a race, and am stopping to take a breath. I do not like the way things have been going lately. I feel restless and ill at ease. I see that if I would be happy in God, I must give Him all. And there is a wicked reluctance to do that. I want Him - but I want to have my own way, too. I want to walk humbly and softly before Him, and I want to go where I shall be admired and applauded. To whom shall I yield? To God? Or to myself? The issue must be settled once and for all.
Why do I love this wretchedly honest statement? Because it exposes the very struggle of my heart! I find myself wanting to do God's will, yet finding much satisfaction and security in being "admired and applauded". I long for approval and high esteem. Why? Because I have not truly died to self. Because I want the glory that is due to Christ alone.

To whom shall I yield?

Do I yield to the flesh? Do I keep seeking my worth in man? The applaud and praise of man only leaves me empty and boastful of self. Is this what I truly desire as a Christ follower? What do I want others to see in my life? Self or a soul redeemed and glorified in Christ!

Do I yield to God? Only in Him can I find true satisfaction and rest for my soul. He is the protector and sustainer of my life. I deny Him when I boast in self. I deny His power, mercy and grace. I want God to receive all praise and honor . . . Yet self is always there - hungry for attention - crying for admiration - screaming for a standing ovation.

Father, give me a heart that is satisfied in You alone. Give me a heart that is humble like our gentle Savior, Christ Jesus. Give me a heart that proclaims Your fame, Your goodness, Your wisdom and Your abundant grace. Forgive me, Father, for the "wicked reluctance" I have in holding my self in such high esteem.

May all glory, power and honor be Yours.

Praise be to God alone through Christ Jesus our Lord!

Comments

Anonymous said…
Good word, Amy. I believe that this defines the heart of every man's struggle, for while we are in this world, we are attached to the flesh...which loves its own glory. Praise God that we have such a great deliverance from who we once were...and we are daily becoming who we were meant to be!
Anonymous said…
Amy,
I read Stepping Heavenward for the first time 2 years ago (right before Christmas!), and it left me SO encouraged! I felt that with so many of "Katherine's" statements that I could have written them or at the very least I really identified with them. The exerpt that you have quoted is one that had really stuck with me--part of me wants to follow Christ, part of me wants to be admired and applauded. It's embarrassing and humbling, and yet such a clear picture of the battle we still have with our flesh.
Thanks for sharing! I'm so glad a friend has discovered this treasure of a book!! I've read it 3 times and it neve gets old.
Much Love,
Glenna

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